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"TIPS and TOPICS" from David Mee-Lee, M.D.

Vol 2, No.4

August 2004
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In this issue
-- SAVVY........
-- SKILLS........
-- SOUL.........
-- SUCCESS STORIES......
-- Until next time......

WELCOME!

A new reader of last month's June/July issue of TIPS and TOPICS asked me if I had considered making the newsletter a monthly publication. I quickly reassured her that it is indeed a monthly publication- except for the summer-when I combine a couple of the months to give myself a little bit of "laid back" relaxation.

So welcome to the August edition. We are now back on track monthly.

SAVVY........
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Just this past week, I had the opportunity to sit in on a treatment-planning meeting with the parents present along with the client and the treatment team. There was an additional meeting with the mother and an interpreter, together with the team. We reviewed the treatment progress, discussed client and family preferences, plus revisions to the plan. As I sat, I wondered to myself how often (or not) this kind of participatory treatment planning occurs in programs around the country. I suspect it is far less often than our politically-correct 'Mission and Vision' statements suggest. And definitely less than what the clinical and service needs of clients and families deserve.

Tips:

 

SKILLS........
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So if family work is to assume a greater role in our assessment and service planning, here are a few tips to think about.

Tips:

SOUL.........
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This month my youngest left for college leaving an empty nest. It is however, not an empty budget - that will remain robust for several years to come! I think we will handle this family stage well without the need for any specific family therapy. But as I have said to her two older siblings, I reiterated my parting and ongoing advice to her as she moves away from the watchful eyes of loving parents: "Remember the five S's." These are the areas of life critical to have thought through ahead of time - to examine one's values, practices and their consequences. It is too late to consider what to do in the immediacy of the moment - the results can be irreversible and profoundly life-changing.

For all of you who have family, friends or clients who might benefit from the five S's, here they are:

1. Substances - Besides addiction that is treatable, there are consequences that can be irreversible: acute intoxication that causes a fatal accident or overdose, or a head injury with permanent cognitive impairment.

2. Sex - In the midst of making out, it is not the time to begin an examination of your values and practices about abstinence, safer sex, pregnancy and abortion.

3. Speed - I don't mean stimulants, I mean cars and driving speed. When the tire blows out and the car rolls, or the car upfront suddenly stops, or the road is wet and the brakes don't work well - that is too late to think about speeding.

4. Seat belts - When the car is rolling or you are heading for the windshield, it is too late to buckle up.

5. Sleepiness - I read somewhere that a sleepy driver is as dangerous to self and others as a drunk driver. When my son sideswiped the median barrier dozing off for a split second after a late date, sleepiness was added to the list.

It is a family joke to mention the five S's. But hopefully it will prevent some pain, save lives and that's no joke.

SUCCESS STORIES......
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"First of all I want to tell you how much I've enjoyed reading your Tips and Topics e- zine, and the way you weave your knowledge into practical discussion is sheer genius. I guess you can assess I am a fan. Obviously you are a busy person, and may get plenty enough feedback. I still feel compelled to reply with a few comments regarding the issue of relapse and sustained support. My heart leapt when I first heard it said that a relapsing customer should be dealt with in a positive manner instead of being chided and turned out. As a past chronic relapser, I can tell you that it can make all the difference in the world being treated with the respect of hope rather than like a leper. I had been in and out of treatment facilities; always kicked out for using.

The last one I went through (8 years ago) was different as I did not feel like a hopeless case, but instead treated as an individual who could work through the hardest part, with help of course. I always wondered why my failure to stay abstinent would be met with that ol' righteous indignation, almost as if it was taken personally! There was a lack of understanding of "seeds being planted". Looking back, I realize that last facility was unusual in their approach and years ahead of their time...Thank God. Their cup was not already full, and they were willing to try a different approach.

Also, a quick note on needle exchange programs. I had been a loyal customer for many years, and am certain this service kept me from dying of AIDS as what happened to many of my not-as-careful friends. A couple of times when "re-ordering", I was met by protesters just filled with that righteous indignation that these programs would be allowed "to enable drug addicts". I cannot forget the scorn and the ugly words spewed as I exchanged my stash of needles. Honestly, their display did nothing for me, only made me hurry to use!

I feel very fortunate to work in a facility that values a balance of care and gentle confrontation. I believe we truly help/have helped/will help many individuals because of this approach and what a great feeling that is! I believe your influence, as a trainer is directly to do with this, and I thank you."

Respectfully,
A counselor in recovery


Until next time......
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I hope this edition of TIPS and TOPICS has been helpful. Thanks to all who send feedback, comments and questions. I really appreciate your insights even if I can't get to respond to them all.

Talk to you in September.
David




Contact Information
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email: info@dmlmd.com
voice: 530-753-4300
web: http://www.dmlmd.com

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